Riding

man, i dont post enough entries in this blog to go into many details (anymore) but ill try not to speak in generalities, okay? :)

Well, things are good for me but to be honest they always are. I got some things sorted out at school and i ended up with only 2 classes buahaha. I just moved back in with my dad after what seemed like a month long binder. I am still head over heels by the way, and holy shit, yesterday renata FELL DOWN THE STAIRS and hurt her ankle so i went over and layed with her and tried to help her with stuff and it was nice, except her recent injury :P (btw my blogs are jumpy like my mind but you are gonna have to bare with me) i feel like im at a key part of my life, and this is where everything needs to fall in place. I need to graduate and get on the right path and head off to college. I need to be better in my relationship with Renata. God knows she deserves it. In fact, she even mentioned breaking up with me and i know it was just an impulsive, quick thought but it devastated me. I was just pacing up and down a hallway for like 45 minutes, not knowing if i should scream and break something or just cry or something, so i did neither haha. Sometimes it does feel like shes not feeling as strongly about me as i do about her but thats okay. Nothing i can do to change that i guess except be myself and do my best. Really, nothing bad ever happens i just get super upset over stupid little shit. Thats really what causes our few little problems. Like we went to a little party thing and up until the end everything was perfect. Like, we were laughing and having fun and we were the only ones dancing for a slow song and it was really nice but then we got in an elevator, and she just mentioned that last time she was at that place, well, it doesnt matter its not really any of your business but she just said some meaningless little thing and i felt sick afterward. I hate this blog because i start most entries on a positive note but end up talking about a bunch of stupid little bullshit. But its not accurate because there are soooo many things going on that are just amazing but i guess i get used to it and then all i can see is the bad stuff. I dont want that to happen, because i could end up losing all the good things and just be stuck with the all the bad stuff that at one time is all i could think about. yeah i hope this made sense by the way :P That didnt really come out the way i meant it, i meant it like...

Renata is so amazing and perfect (which she doesnt even know) and i have this flaw that makes me see stupid little stuff and get upset. But, i promise it wont happen anymore. pinky promise. <3

Slam

Man oh man, im sorry ive been neglecting you, blogger. i dont really consider anything that happens to me "blogger-worthy" but whatever. god ive been skipping soooo much class. but its ok becuase i only need one credit and ive got a 97 in principles of business! boo-yah.Ive been hanging out with my friend brandon a lot lately which is good because hes prolly been my friend for a larger portion of my life than anyone else. hes funny as shit too. My ears are up to 7/16s i shouldve skipped to 1/2 but i wanted to play it safe. God, see i told you blogger, this stuff is puretty boring ha. I do have some interesting stuff to say though so chill out. Things are STILL going well with Renata. Well is a bit of an understatement though. I mean we DO hav3e disagreements and bad days and stuff but the thing that makes us so amazing together is that we just get through it and bounce back, better than ever :D Not to mention, ive never felt this strongly about a girl before. I try to give her space and stuff but i want to see her so badly that i must come off as needy sometimes but I DONT CARE. buahaha. GODAMN i love molotov solution. Yeah, im listening to them right now, i just want to raise my fist to the heavens and scream it from a mountain top "this band is really good!" :P. i think im gonna quit watching TV for a while. Life just seems so much better without it. Like yesterday, I woke up, and fished all day. I hadnt fished in atleast 4 years or so and i had forgotten just how relaxing it is. Everything else just fades away and all that matters is you and the lake. *sigh* Back to relationships and gheyness, Im actually going with her to look for a dress for someone else. I dont think you guys understand what this means, if it was with ANYONE ELSE IN THE WORLD theres no fucking way i would go. srsly. I wish i could be more romantic