The Loss

I like me, to be honest. Well, 'like" is a strong word. Lets just say im satisfied with myself while still longing for improvement. No matter what happens, all i ever see of myself is a negative image, what i could be or should be, and if i ever improve, instead of seeing myself better, i merely see that list of thngs getting smaller. Ha, i think this is the ONLY area that i should actually get better with. Just being happy with myself. Oh, and i guess i could get my prioriies a little fixed, like not playing stupid little back in order. Like not playing stupid little compuiter games even for a MINUTE when ive got a beautiful amazing girl beside me thats actually in love with me that wants me to kiss her :P

moving on
ive noticed that everyone around me has totally different experiences than me, or atleast a different outlook. For example, other people always seem have cute little things to say or just notice little stuff that makes them sooo happy and just love everything. Now im not saying im a huge pessimist and hate everything or anything, in fact its the contrary. I love life. maybe i hate people, but i love life. In fact i think that with all the shit thats happened to me, id have to love life this much just to go on. anyways yeah, I dont have cute little things that i notice about stuff, i dont really know WHAT i have that makes me happy, a good best friend maybe (<3 <3 <3) maybe just my love for certain things. Like walking with my cousins down the street to a log cabin, or riding a golf off jumps in a field haha. Maybe even just sitting at home with my girl and just watching a movie, or not. Idk what really keeps me going, but im thankful :)